WAR: Team Barstool VS Team Barstool Philly In The First Round Of The TBT Tournament
Last week, Pres The Longshanks on his high horse in Boston went against the advice of his own people and declared war on the Barstool Philly Basketball team. The way he was talking he might as well declared Prima Noctra on the entire region of Philadelphia.
Bring it.
Are we the most talented squad on paper? Of course not. Last time I checked games aren’t played on paper and even the greatest underdog has a chance to win. Ever hear of Valley Forge and Bunker Hill? We’re a rag tag bunch of misfits assembled together specifically to play as one, and that’s all that matters. The ’93 Phils with possibly a greater alcohol problem. Darth Sidious of The Chosen People thinks he can wrangle up a couple NBA players and come into town with their dicks swinging low for an easy victory. Not gonna happen. We may not win but you better believe we’ll go down swinging, especially in Philly. You can buy your tickets here to watch the battle unfold.
CUE THE SPEECH:
Not to mention our jerseys will be the freshest* basketball gear since that Starter Jacket of the Charlotte Hornets everyone for some reason owned. The Liberty Bell alone makes the shorts almost too hot to wear.
*If you don’t think I’m wearing this puppy to every single No Shower Happy Hour in Sea Isle this Summer then you obviously don’t think.